


Bartering with Baked Goods

by PaxieAmor



Category: Marvel 616, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M, Pineapple and Coconut Scones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-08
Updated: 2013-02-08
Packaged: 2017-11-28 15:06:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/675768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaxieAmor/pseuds/PaxieAmor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint hates Piña Coladas, but loves Coulson’s Pineapple and Coconut scones.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bartering with Baked Goods

**Author's Note:**

  * For [flatbear (duffnstuff)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/duffnstuff/gifts).



> Minor Spoilers for Secret Avengers #1! If you haven’t seen the preview yet, [please click here](http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/JoshWildingNewsAndReviews/news/?a=73932)! 
> 
> As I said, this is a mix between 616 and MCU, because I’m more used to writing MCU, but as I said, the idea is inspired by Secret Avengers #1, which is 616.
> 
> Written for my buddy [flatbear](http://flatbear.tumblr.com), because she is made of awesome and is always there for me to ask comic questions and never makes me feel stupid when I don’t understand things <3

There are scones, and then there are _scones_. There are some scones that are basically muffins in triangle form, and there are some that are more like dinner rolls than scones, and there are some that Clint doesn’t even understand how someone could even think they’re scones…

But then there are _scones_. Proper scones, with just the right ratio of savory to sweet, with chunks of fruit or berries or chocolate, that crumble just so when you bite into them and even stick to the roof of your mouth sometimes. The kind of scones that remind Clint of the few good times in the Circus, of Ainslie, the English fortune teller who pretended to be a Russian for the crowds and insisted that Clint join her for Cream tea on Sundays, where she always had these Devonshire Tea Scones, split in two and spread with clotted cream that she made herself. They took a little getting used to, but Clint, who always ate like his stomach was a small black hole, found himself savoring every bite and making that single scone last as long as possible.

Agent Phil Coulson makes proper scones and Clint Barton kind of hates him for it.

It started with Pineapple and Coconut; Clint hates Piña Coladas, but loves Coulson’s Pineapple and Coconut scones. He remembers tasting the first one that day with Natasha, just before telling him exactly what they thought of the whole secret agent thing they were being asked to be a part of and momentarily forgetting why they were there, because that’s how good the scones were. Coulson must have taken note of Clint’s face or something, because he never made those scones again.

Unless he needed something big.

Budapest took two dozen scones, while New Mexico took one dozen.  Other operations took around the same, never any more than two dozen and rarely any less than one. When Clint learned that Coulson had a taste for more savory cheese scones (they were like those kick ass cheddar bay biscuits from Red Lobster, but more scone-y and therefore better), he decided that two could play at that game; upgrades to his bow for a dozen scones, more range time for half a dozen, two dozen as an apology for an op gone wrong, even though it wasn’t Clint’s fault…

They surprised each other with a dozen each as a “I’m sorry our first date got interrupted by a blonde on steroids in the middle of the New Mexico desert” gift/bribe.

Following the Chitauri invasion, after Clint found out what had happened to Coulson on the Helicarrier, he went home to his apartment and baked himself a dozen cheese scones, spending the night on the living room floor, eating them one by one. That in itself was probably a mistake, but then he decided to chase it with the strongest whiskey he had on hand and spent the next day with his head in the toilet. He’s not sure how he got there, but he’s pretty sure he owes Natasha one.

When he opened his locker a few months later and found a plate of still steaming pineapple and coconut scones, he almost collapsed. When he heard Coulson clear his throat behind him, he turned and tackled him, kissing him with everything he had.

The next day, a plate of orange and cranberry scones was delivered to Director Fury’s office; only the director knew they were a “sorry I’m shagging your sniper” gift. Fury didn’t care, as long as they stayed out of his office.


End file.
